A Husband Day

Yesterday I had the rare privilege to spend an entire day with my husband without our child. Don't get me wrong, you know I love me some Colin BUT I do so love my husband with all my heart and rarely get him all to myself. 

Ms Tina, my teacher's assistant, has taken the summer off to go home and live with her parents, save some money, come back in the fall for school and work with me. But she came back Thursday for our Pre-K Completion Celebration. She agreed to stay over until Saturday and keep Colin for us (free of charge) all day and night yesterday, subbed for me at work so I could have a day and night with JD. Bless you Tina. 

We had such a good time. I introduced JD to a pedicure - of which he needed desperately and he introduced me to Happy Feet (a foot reflexology place), we grocery shopped, we washed the car, we went to lunch, we went to a movie, we shopped The Grove, we sat in a friends' hot tub that were out of town, we made dinner, etc. etc. etc. :) and we had a fantastic wonderful day. 

So all you wives, I highly recommend it, go have a Husband Day. 

Thank you Husband - it was the best!

From the Jungle to the Ocean

Turned the Jungle into the Ocean. See the bottom of the boat? It's on the ceiling. See my fishing basket? Yea, it worked. Let the commotion in the ocean begin. I'll let you know how the kids like it. 

It Etwa

For my birthday I went to get a pedicure. I  was in dire need of my pedis being cured. BAD shape. The last one had been November. So, I believe that at least once a year, every woman and man should get a pedicure. But in CA where flip flops are worn year-round, you need at least two, if not one a month. 

So I go with my dear friend Andi who is treating me to a Celestina Day. She needs a pedi too. We sit. She gets her girl and I get Nicole. I type the following story with much endearment, for she won me over. Typing her accent will be a bit of a challenge but you'll get the idea if you'll just read it aloud with perfect phonetics. 

Now, you know how it is, they begin with mostly hand motions. They being the Vietnamese ladies and men who tend to be in a nail salon. They motion you to sit in a chair. They motion you to put your feet in. They motion or touch a foot to come out and be placed in a certain spot. They motion you to change feet. They make a little noise for you to choose if you want your nail clipped or filed. Sometimes you can go an entire pedi without ever having a conversation with your technician. This was not one of those days. 

I had decided that I was going to go with a French Pedicure so that it would last a long time. My time for nails is slim to none. I have desire. I don't have time. Hence the six month stent. Anyway, I try to explain as she's making me choose between clipping and filing that one of my nails is really short because I had broken it recently. 

Her: It okay, I make. 

Me: Okay. But don't clip it anymore. 

Her: It okay, I make. 

Me: resigning Okay. 

She gets my nails all cleaned up and she's very happy. She smiles at me a lot. I know this not because I see her smile, due to the mask, but her eyes crinkle and she tilts her head. Finally she asks me my name. 

Her: Wha yoo nam?

Me: Celeste. What's yours? 

Her: said at lightning speed: Nico...Li Nico Kima, you no har? Hee Hee Hee

Me: I'm sorry again. (I'm thinking she said her last name but by her tone I'm aware she's asked me a question but I haven't a clue what she asked. And that whatever she said was extremely funny to her)

Her: Nico....lik Nico Kima, you no har? Hee Hee Hee

I desperately look at Andi. She smiles and says, "Nicole Kidman. You know her?" Aa Ha. 

Me: Nicole Kidman. Yes, I'm aware of who she is. I've never met her however. 

At this point in my pedi, Nicole looks up and asks

Nicole: Yoo wan kalla remov?

Me: Do I need it? 

Nicole: O Ya, yoo nee!

Me: Okay. 

Nicole: big smile It etwa.

Me: What? 

Nicole: bigger smile It etwa. 

Again I look to Andi for translation. She smiles and says, "It's extra." At which Nicole rapidly shakes her head up and down. 

Me: Oh. It's okay. 

Nicole goes and gets the necessary tool to remove the calluses from my heels. I know I'm desperate. I've never done this. Then she brings back what looks like a grinder. Really?! 

Nicole works for a long time on my feet. She is no longer smiling under the mask. I'm pretty sure she cussing me out but I can't tell. Finally she's done. 

She begins painting my toes. She makes me a nail. Then at the right moment she asks: 

Nicole: Yoo wan flawa?

Me: Flower? 

Nicole: Ya, yoo wan flawa? I pan yoo flawa. 

Me: Okay.  

Nicole: It etwa. 

Me: Of course it is. It's okay. 

Nicole: I pan yoo 2 flawa. 

Me: Okay. 

She works a long time more. I was glad I wasn't in a hurry. At this point Andi was done. She was just letting her nails dry. 

Finally she's all done. She slides on my flip flops. Then she says this: 

Nicole: Yoo ah prewee now. Yoo no way six mon moor to cum baa. Twee wee, yoo baa. Oka?

Me: Okay. 

It's been almost five weeks. But you know, she did a great job and her paint has lasted. Even if it was etwa. 

You Can't Just....

The art in being a teacher is turning anything that might be trash into something creative while teaching the children at the same time. Giving new definition to: reuse, reduce and recycle. You remember my allotastuff post, well I've caught a full blown stage 5 since becoming a teacher. I can find a use for just about anything given long enough to think about it and having just the right opportunity present itself. Sometimes, I scare myself. I'll write about the garage sale sickness later. Anyway back to current story. So here are a couple of examples of how my new sickness is serving me: 

Example One: We were going to do jungle week. It was about three weeks away. I knew it was coming. I wasn't sure what my plans were but I had it in my head to create something fun and new for the kids in the classroom. Then as if the Divine was with me, the day before trash day a few weeks ago I drove home and there were two old silk potted plants sitting by someone's trash. They had elephant plant leaves. PERFECT I thought. I snagged them thinking, "I'm not sure how these are going to work, but I'm going to use them during Jungle Week." Flash forward to this week (jungle week) I haul them to my classroom, tear them apart and create a jungle in the reading area for my kids to explore and enjoy. It was a HIT!!! It had jungle sounds that they could listen to, stuffed and plastic animals endogenous to the jungle, some brown paper, a big plant from the auditorium, four yards of blue material and two yards of green (recycled from the Children's Choir props), and the silk leaves from my side of the road plants as foliage. Even found a place to put Sally, our pink Boa Constrictor. The kids fought over it the first day and argued who had been in the jungle too long and who's turn it was next. They eventually learned how to share and it turned out to be one of my best ideas so far. 

Example Two: Always thinking ahead. Next week is Ocean Week. Capitalizing on what I had already started, I was going to create the bottom of the Ocean for next week. I've already got the blue and green material exactly where it will need to go. Just need to build the bottom of the ocean. Again, Wednesday, the day before trash day, Colin and I are driving home. By someone's trash is a great metal basket. Kinda like what you might find balls in at a golf course. I immediately see a fishing basket with a catch inside, hanging from my ceiling as if off the bow of someone's boat that you could see if you were swimming around underwater, in the ocean. 

I pull to a stop, back up, and put the car in park. Colin wonders what in the world I'm doing. I explain that I want this basket for our ocean week. I snag the basket, hand it to Colin and drive on home. Colin likes the basket and wants to know if he can keep it after ocean week. Sure. Why not? 

Then he says, "But Mom, you can't just go around stealing stuff." 

I presented the, "if it's trash, then it's not stealing. They were throwing it away. I saved it. I recycled it. I'll reuse it and reduce the landfill by one little basket. I deserve a medal. 

After he thought about that and decided my argument was solid, he asked if we could go back and get the chair that the basket was sitting on. I declined because, you know, you just can't go around stealing stuff. 

This is a Dollar?

Colin and I drove through McDonald's about two weeks ago and I must relay the transaction that took place. I drove away afraid for my child's education and thankful that I'm a teacher and he will know the difference between the coins of the United States of America. 

I had 35 cents in change coming. The kid, at the window could've been 14 or 22. I can't tell how hold they are. The older I get, the younger kids look to me. Let's just say he was old enough to know better, or should've known better. He hands me a dime and a Susan B. Anthony silver dollar. I look at it. I know I'm only supposed to be getting 35 cents back so I say, 

"You gave me too much." 

"I did?" astonished that he could've made such a mistake

"Yes, you gave me a dollar and ten cents. I'm only supposed to get back 35 cents." 

"I gave you a quarter and a dime." 

"No, you gave me this." I hand it back. "This is a dollar." 

"This is a dollar!?" as if he's never seen such a thing.

"Yes, it's a Susan B. Anthony silver dollar, not a quarter." 

"Oh." He takes the dollar, gives me a quarter. 

Then I think, he doesn't deserve this dollar. I ask, 

"Can I have it?" 

blank stare

"I mean, can I trade it?" I offer a dollar bill

"Okay" he takes my bill, hands me back the coin. 

"Thanks."

I drive away astonished. 

WOW!

A Mess

The last week was one of my busiest all year. The Children's Choir performed their spring musical this weekend. I'm involved, Colin's involved, we're busy! Prep for that was huge. Time for that was emence. Time for all the other things that still had to be done came from my sleeping time. And let's just be honest, a bunch of stuff didn't get done at all - you should see my ironing pile! The inside of the car looked like a nuclear bomb went off. The only reason poor Colin's sheets got changed is because the cat managed to get in there and take a nap causing an Asthma attack. You can write your name on every surface in my house provided you can find the surface, the stuff in the refrigerator is now a science experiment, the toilets are desperate (I live with boys) and, and, and, ....I digress. 

Anyway, this was a little nugget from Colin. He's said this before. I don't know, maybe he's right. 

We drive through McDonalds on the way to the first program on Friday night. I won't tell you how many other times we had driven through. My poor child. He needed to eat, we needed to go, McDs is on the way, he'll eat it, and I needed Diet Coke bad (back on the sauce people, back on it hard). 

So we pull out. I'm trying to drive, open his apple juice, his apple dippers (we do eat some of the healthy stuff too) and pass it back to him while avoiding people who don't know how to drive. And I'm desperate for the first sip of my DC. I always ask for extra ice because I like my drink cold - I want it cold for a long time and I want it cold all the way to the bottom. Well, bless McD's heart, they want me to have every drop of sauce I deserve for my hard earned dollar so they fill it to the rim. My cup overfloweth, no doubt. 

I get my cup out, I see a red light coming, I begin to break, I sip, I tip, DC dribbles down my choir shirt, it's cold, it's wet, it's a mess. 

"Ahhhhh, Oh for crying out loud! wipe, soak, wipe, break, stop, breath, sip again and again and once again ...Colin, your Mommy's a mess. Do you know this? Your Mommy's a mess!" 

With his little mouth full of apples he responds, "God shoudda made you a boy." 

Salt Licked

In memory: 

Salt was put to sleep by a very sweet vet who had sympathy for her inability to be a good mother, her blindness, neurological problems, paralyzed left side, and starvation.  

May she rest in peace. 

Side note: the kids have almost forgotten Salt existed. I don't have to change the cage as often. Scissors has started being nicer. And the birds moved to the two-year-old room. Things have calmed considerably in the classroom pet department. Ahhhhhhh.

Daddy will never....

So I'm always telling Colin that I have eyes in the back of my head. He thinks I'm crazy but has enough curiosity and evidence of my "eyes" that he doesn't down right defy them. 

One day my boss told Colin, "Your mom has eyes in the back of her head. Don't you know that?" You should've seen the look on his face. Since then, my eyes, have even more intrigue to him. (Thanks Mia). 

Today we're shopping in a store. Colin says, "Mom, kids have eyes in the side of their heads."

I said, "No buddy. Kids just have two eyes. You have to be a grown up to have extra eyes in your head. And even more than that, you have to be a MOM!" 

pause / thinking

"Daddy will never be a Mom." 

I couldn't have said it better if I tried. 

Kissing for Days

Colin: Can I watch the DVD player? 

Me: For a kiss

Colin: Okay. 

kiss

Colin: You can have thirty thousand kisses.

Me: Cool, thanks!

pause

Colin: If you got that many, we'd be kissing for days!